I feel like a failure, but at the same time, I know it isn't my fault. I found out, by accident and out of necessity, that crash dieting packs the pounds right back on and then some. This is the very reason why I never diet. I know I won't stick to it. Hell, if I hadn't been going to the ER every 3 days with that chest pain, I wouldn't have even kept up with the low fat diet until my surgery. I really felt like God was saying, you need to lose weight; your body is sick; and if you won't do it on your own, I'll make you do it! But now the pain is gone, and I am right back to eating cheeses all day long. (That's really the only thing I didn't have then and am having now.)
I was looking at my chart today and realized... two weeks ago I went over the first line... I am only a couple pounds from going over the second line which will put me back to where I was right after giving birth. If I don't lose this week, I will be over that second line and less than 10lbs from where I was while pregnant. How did I go from losing 23lbs to losing only 10? From where I am today, I need to lose 3lbs a week until the end of the year (only 4 months away!) to reach my goal of 180lbs.
That is not cool! I feel horrible but have no idea what to do. I could exercise more I guess, but obviously I am too busy or lazy to since I'm not doing more than 10 mins or so a day right now. Last week I blamed the heat since we didn't have water for me to bathe in. This week is my period and I am cramping too much to do aerobics. Are those even valid excuses? Arg! I just don't know how to get that stupid butterfly (my weight loss ticker) moving back to the right again!
Should I just suck it up and do the low fat thing again? I'm worried I'll be hungry and bitchy all the time and then gain it all back once I reach my goal... I don't know. What do you think? Extreme weight loss means extreme measures right? Maybe I should work hard and diet.
EDIT:
I am hearing a lot about Weight Watchers from y'all, but I just can't make myself pay for something that I could do on my own. I know if I eat lots of fruits and veggies, and less breads and fats that I will lose weight. I know about portion control. I just feel like I'll be paying someone to tell me what I already know... How is it any different?
Maybe I should order one of those eating systems that sends you prepacked foods. That way I don't have to guess about my foods or fix anything. Just pop it in the oven or microwave and eat. Anyone tried one of those?
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