Monday, January 31, 2011

Owie...

All day long I have been trying to figure out why my freakin' sides and abs are killing me!  Then it donned on me...

I was doing that for 12 minutes yesterday!  I also did some step... that's probably why my legs and butt hurt.  Wii fit rocks!  Oh how I've missed you!

Motivation Monday, January 29

Announcement: This will be the last MM with a linky since it will cost money from here on out.  Since I've only ever had 3 people link up I doubt it will even be a problem, but if you are planning on joining me after this week, please feel free to leave your link in my comments.  I'll be sure to stop by.

Motivation Monday



Welcome to Motivation Monday! I will be chronicling my journey back to a healthy body, mind, and spirit. Each week I will discuss how the previous week was and set some goals for the next week. I will also be listing my progress. If you would like to see past progress you can click on the Motivation Monday photo above for other Motivation Monday posts.

If you would like to get motivated with me please link up your post using the link form below. Your post can be in any format you want.Whether you are trying to get healthier physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually or if you just have a task you need some motivation to complete...please link up so we can help support each other. I would love to hear about your progress and help keep you motivated!

Healthy Steps
My Week's Workouts:
  • Short 1 Mile Walk (Moderate)
  • Lower Body Weight Training (Moderate)
  • Upper Body Weight Training (Hard)
  • Shoveling Snow from the Driveway and Walks (Moderate)
  • Wii Fit hula hooping and step (Light)
Changes I've Seen This Week

My numbers went back down to where I was two weeks ago.  That's a step in the right direction.  Earlier this week I had lost over 4lbs.  I gained 2lbs back, but a 2lb loss during one week is pretty good.  Today I am going to plan out a new daily schedule for myself to help me stay organized.  I'll incorporate time with DH and LB, work outs, sitting down to eat, household chores, time for my Bible study, and down time to relax.  I'll continue to track my daily exercise and calorie counting as well.  It's been a struggle these last couple of days to keep up with it, but I think it is making a difference.

My Numbers {From Last Saturday's Weigh In}
{Green is Improvement, Red is Bad, Mmkay?, Blue is Stayed the Same}


Weight -226
BMI % -54.4
Water % -34.2
Muscle Mass % -33

How did you do this week?
Link up below! If you'd like to have the blog hop linky on your post like mine, just press "Get the Code Here" and copy/paste it into your post.

Saturday, January 29, 2011

New Work Out Tracking

If you read my Fitness and Food Logs then you might have noticed some new work out details.  I figured I would take the time to explain them in case you are interested in following along.  I am using a Polar wrist watch heart rate monitor with chest strap during my workouts.  It tracks my workout time, heart rate, and calories burned.  It then gives me a summary report at the end of my work out. Here is my first work out with the HR monitor with explanation in purple.

Jan. 20, 2011 - 1 mile walk, Upper and Lower body workouts {The Work Out this is tracking}
Total Duration {Of the workout and cool down} 01:04:16
354 Calories Burned {During the entire workout}(55% fat) {The amount burned in fat burn HR zone}
HR Max 153 - 78% {My maximum heart rate and the % of heart rate compared to my target zone}
HR Avg 127 - 65% {My average heart rate through the whole workout and the % of heart rate compared to my target zone}
Exercise time in zone (117-135HR) {My heart rate fat burn zone}  00:49:10 {Total time I stayed within that fat burn zone}

Here is what the workout will look like on my Fitness entry:

Jan. 23, 2011 - Shoveling Snow
Total Duration 00.16.03 
Calories Burned  90 (55% fat)
HR Max 145 - 74%
HR Avg 129 - 66%
Exercise time in zone (117-135HR) 00:10:58

Friday, January 28, 2011

Unconventional Exercises

I decided I would share some of my unconventional exercises with y'all and see what you think.  The goal is to get moving, any way we can right?  Well, here are some ways I get moving during the day:
  • Sex - great cardio session, sorta like kick-boxing but without the kicking or punching, unless of course, that is your cup of tea
  • Making Love - great for getting your heart rate up and sustained.  Also good for stretching and strengthening your muscles, like pilates.
  • Rearranging the Furniture - five times in one day because it just isn't perfect and well, it really was better the way it was in the first place
  • Playing with the Kids - especially if they weigh 26 lbs and can't walk yet and need to be carried everywhere
  • Vacuuming - have you ever vacuumed a shag length carpet with a $20 wal-mart vacuum?  'nough said.
  • Doing Dishes - if you don't have a dishwasher and you like to dance while you scrub...
  • Folding Laundry - This can be considered a complete day's worth of working out if you are like me and you procrastinate two weeks of laundry until it grows into a 5 ft wide, 2 ft tall pile of clean clothes awaiting folding.
  • Chasing After an Escaped Indoor Cat - On second thought, I don't advise that one.
What are some unconventional exercises you do during your day to keep moving?

Here is a fun calculator that shows you how much you burn doing ALL kinds of activities after you put in your weight, height, and age.  I burn 151 calories per hour taking care of LB for example.

http://www.fitday.com/webfit/burned/calories_burned.html

    Thursday, January 27, 2011

    Loving Yourself For Who You Are

    EDIT:  After re-reading my post I realize I sound very critical on all people who are overweight.  I did not mean to sound that way.  This post was about my disgust with my own body.  I just felt that most of my posts sound so easy and uplifting when I really don't feel that way all the time.  Losing this weight is not easy and I am not happy about my life (as far as my weight is concerned), how I got here, or the apparent difficulty it is to get healthy again.  It was so easy to get unhealthy.  I simply went to the Dr. every three months and got a shot in my hip then went about my life.  It may have been the right course of action at the time, but looking back I know now that it was the easy way out and now I am paying the price.

    Now that I have had time to calm down from last night and not write while upset, I would like to explain my feelings a bit better.  I will leave my original post below in italics because I don't believe it is right to delete it outright.  I wrote it, published it, and although I used the wrong wording to say what I meant, it is no less true today than it was last night.  Just a bit more harsh on myself.  Here is what I meant to convey, hopefully in the right words today:

    It seems like the phrase "love yourself for who you are" applies more to people who are relatively healthy but who envy the "perfect" body.  Anytime I hear someone say that I then hear them talk about "those last few pounds" or a blemish that will never go away.  To me, it seems to have a bit less impact to myself who is morbidly obese.  I guess I feel like that saying is telling me to "accept myself for who I am and get over it".  There is no "getting over" who I am today.  If I continue down the path I am on right now I won't likely live to see my grandchildren.  I may not even survive a second pregnancy.  I nearly died giving birth to LB, twice.  I think perhaps that phrase should instead say "accept yourself for where you are right now and work healthfully to get where you want to be".  That I can live with.  It is just frustrating that there is plenty of advice for the woman who is struggling over those last 5lbs but time after time all I hear for my situation is eat less and exercise more.  Although that may be the key to weight loss, that advice completely ignores the fact that I struggle just as much emotionally over my weight as the woman who is beating herself up over those last few pounds.  I guess I'm just feeling bitter about people assuming every overweight person became that way through gluttony.  In fact, most of us eat healthily and exercise weekly or even daily as is the case for several of the blogs I read.  Why does our self esteem mean any less than someone else's?

    Again, I apologize if my original words seemed harsh and universal.  I intended them to speak of myself and how I feel toward my body as it is, not for obesity as a whole.


    Tuesday, January 25, 2011

    Hot Diggity Dog!

    Just for giggles I stepped on the scale this morning.  Do you know what it read?!  224.6 lbs.  That is a 4.2 lb loss since Saturday morning's official weigh in, which is 2.1 lbs a day!  I haven't been meeting my 1200 calorie daily goal... but counting my calories has made me more conscious of the food I eat.  I guess I was mindlessly snacking before and didn't realize it.  I can't wait to see my results this Saturday after I've been to the gym a couple of times this week.  My  Wii fit replacement game comes sometime next week.  I can't wait to have it back!  I love doing the step and hula hooping.

    Heck, I don't even care if it doesn't stay off... just knowing that this is making a difference, and such a BIG one at that, makes me want to continue.  Maybe I'll get to celebrate my 50 lbs lost sooner than expected... {and my under 200 lbs party!}

    Monday, January 24, 2011

    Please Excuse the Dust

    I am implementing my new blog design today.  I am hopeful that it will go live without a hitch, but I am not a professional blog designer so there's no telling what could happen.  If you spot something a bit odd or maybe the header is half way off your screen, please leave me a comment here so I can see what went wrong (and hopefully fix it).  I hope you like it.  I've been working on my blog on DH's desktop and I noticed that the background looked almost white.  It was pretty plain and boring.  I figured as a new year - new me move I would ramp up the blog and make it a little more exciting.  After all, what's the point of a weight loss blog if not to inspire the blogger to get moving?

    P.S.
    If you like my design and would like a free blog design for yourself let me know.  I can't guarantee to be finished by any set time or that it will even work on your blog, but I was thinking of possibly branching out into blog design and I could use the practice working with a customer.  If it all works out well perhaps I can open a business creating blog designs.

    Sunday, January 23, 2011

    Motivation Monday, January 24

    Motivation Monday




    Welcome to Motivation Monday! I will be chronicling my journey back to a healthy body, mind, and spirit. Each week I will discuss how the previous week was and set some goals for the next week. I will also be listing my progress. If you would like to see past progress you can click on the Motivation Monday photo above for other Motivation Monday posts.

    If you would like to get motivated with me please link up your post using the link form below. Your post can be in any format you want.Whether you are trying to get healthier physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually or if you just have a task you need some motivation to complete...please link up so we can help support each other. I would love to hear about your progress and help keep you motivated!

    Thursday, January 20, 2011

    Changing My Strategy

    Tonight I decided I need a change in my weight loss strategy.  I did make it to the gym and came home to find all your wonderful comments.  Thanks so much y'all!  BTW, I am totally going to create an award for you guys who comment so often... you never fail to bring me out of my funk.  That's coming later, for now I need to rethink this whole losing weight thing.

    Like I said in this post, I really have no idea why I want to lose weight.  I've been working on a list, brainstorming with the hubby, and will reveal it sometime next week so be watching for that.  Once I have figured out Why I want to lose weight, I ought to figure out How I plan on doing it.  Since going off the Depo I really haven't had to work to lose weight.  Because I put the weight on so quickly and it was being artificially kept on (the drug makes your body believe you are pregnant), my resting heart rate was already in the fat burning zone.  If I did anything around the house I lost weight.  That's when I got lazy.  I've been off it long enough though that that is no longer the case.  I now have to work at losing weight.  I can totally see you rolling your eyes at me right now.  Yeah, yeah, welcome to normal weight loss... But that is exactly why I've realized it is time to kick my butt into gear.

    My new strategy:

    Struggling

    I can feel the depression creeping back in.  I am fairly certain it's the birth control, but right now it's the best option for me and my family so I am not going to stop taking it.  I'll continue to monitor it and have my husband watch for cues that it is getting too severe.  As much as I hate the idea of it, I might have to take some medication to neutralize another medication.  Now on to the problem at hand...

    Because of the depression I am finding it very hard to get enough motivation to go to the gym every night.  Tonight I will likely not go because it is -40 out and the gym doesn't have a plug in for the car.  No plug in at that temperature means dead battery and $400 to replace it.  I have work out videos and equipment at home but I can't make myself utilize them either.  I know if I could just get myself to the gym to work out on a regular basis the depression would lift, but we all know taking that first step is the hardest.  I haven't been to the gym since early last week and I am having trouble convincing myself to go again.  Sometimes, okay a lot of the time, I think to myself what's the use?  I've been working on losing weight all year and am essentially where I began pre-pregnancy.  I gained 50lbs during my pregnancy and have lost less than that.  Only 10lbs was what I lost, 40 of it was baby and water weight.  I was 120lbs this time 2 years ago.  It's just so frustrating.

    I don't know how to continue on and the depression isn't doing me any favors either.  I've thought about taking supplements but they all contain stimulants which aren't good for people who suffer from anxiety.  Any suggestions?

    Wednesday, January 19, 2011

    A Dose of Serious Honesty

    Last night before bed, my husband said something last night that literally broke my heart. He had no idea how it would impact me and I am glad he was honest and felt comfortable sharing, but it stung deep nonetheless.  Has anyone ever said something to you, like mentioning something you could do if you weren't so heavy but are unable to do now, that should have motivated you to lose the weight but instead left you bitter and vindictive?  How did you handle it?  I had no idea how to process it.  He apologized for hurting my feelings and I assured him that I was glad he had told me and that I would be fine after I figured out how to feel about it, and that was that last night.

    However, I am pretty sure what he said led to this...

    This morning I woke up from a nightmare that very few have ever had. In fact, to most people I imagine it would be just a strange dream and not a nightmare at all. You see, normally when I dream I see myself as I once was and who I am inside, young and trim, but this time I was just as I look in the mirror. I was sitting at a table sipping a tea with my husband, our son, and some other people whom I did not know. I was reading a cookbook for alternative ways to cook fattening foods and commented on how their recipes still contained some very fatty ingredients that I would rather cut out. A woman came up to me and started in on me about my weight and how I was so irresponsible to my husband and child for being so obese. Surprised, I told her that it was obvious that I am overweight, gesturing to my stomach and shooting a glance at DH and another person at the table who I think was my ex-fiance but he didn't look the same, mentioning that "some" people like to remind me of it often, and polietly thanked her for her opinion. She went on to say that I need to exercise more and not eat so much. I again calmly explained that I in fact only eat one meal a day and that, if anything, I need to eat more to bring my metabolism up. I also told her that I go to the gym every night after DH gets home so he can watch our son. She walked away mumbling about my heaviness and laziness and I woke up. I wanted to cry but there were no tears.

    The thing that upsets me the most is that most people assume I am lazy and eat fatty foods all day long. It's safe to assume that I suppose, since a lot of people who are overweight or obese do just that, but I don't. In fact, it isn't even my fault that I am the way I am right now.  I was a 140lb model with long, beautiful legs and sexy curves before I started taking Depo Provera in high school.  It was the newest birth control on the market so the doctors were pushing it without knowing the ramifications.  My periods were so severe that my doctor said I needed to stop having them or I might need blood transfusions very soon.  Depo would, and did, do that.  It also weakened my muscles and bones, gave me horrible mood swings, pushed me down the deep dark hole of depression and anxiety, and caused me to gain over 70lbs in the first two years.  At that point I was sick with myself; I was taking some anti-depression medication and finally had the will to start working out.  I managed to keep from gaining any more weight, but I was unable to lose any.  Three years later my doctor found a tumor on my ovary, three days before my 23rd birthday.  During surgery I lost the ovary and fallopian tube and almost lost my entire reproductive system.  I remember what the surgeon told me that day in post op... It was pre-cancerous and if we had waited any longer I would have become surgically barren (I was only 23 with our wedding 6 months away), it could happen again with any of my periods, and that I was in the obese category; he suggested I lose a substantial amount of weight by (guess what?) not eating so much junk food and working out more often.  At that time I was eating the healthiest I ever had in my life and working out daily.  DH and I decided two things.  One, I was going off the Depo immediately.  Two, we wanted children and having a child of our own was more important than the risks it could involve.  A year later we became pregnant with LB and you all know the story there.

    It's a sad, painful story, but it's what I have to show for myself.  My life thus far has been made up of sad, misinformed, mistakes.  However, at the time, those decisions were the best available so I had to do what I could with what information I had.  I have no regrets, just a deep sadness and perhaps a little bitterness.  With all that said, it may not be my fault that I am obese, but it IS my fault that I STILL am.  I am off of the Depo provera; I am no longer pregnant; and I am equipped with the tools and information I need to lose weight.  So the big question is, why do I even want to slim down?  I honestly don't know... the only real reason I have is a bit shallow, but I intend to use this week to figure it out, the answer to my W.I.D.T.H. (why I do this here).

    Sunday, January 16, 2011

    Motivation Monday, January 17

    Motivation Monday




    Welcome to Motivation Monday! I will be chronicling my journey back to a healthy body, mind, and spirit. Each week I will discuss how the previous week was and set some goals for the next week. I will also be listing my progress. If you would like to see past progress you can click on the Motivation Monday photo above for other Motivation Monday posts.

    If you would like to get motivated with me please link up your post using the link form below. Your post can be in any format you want.Whether you are trying to get healthier physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually or if you just have a task you need some motivation to complete...please link up so we can help support each other. I would love to hear about your progress and help keep you motivated!

    Friday, January 14, 2011

    Feeling A Little Discouraged

    My numbers are holding steady after a week of working out.  I thought maybe I would gain or not lose weight but that my measurements would be down so I had DH measure me.  They are all up except my hip.  I know I just have to keep trucking on, but I'm not sure what I did wrong this week.  Do I need to work out more than I did?  I didn't really eat more food/sweets than I normally do in a week.  I just don't know.  I am hoping come tomorrow's official weigh in that I will have lost some more or maybe my muscle mass will be up with my body fat down.  Wish me luck!
     {My tape is even pink like hers... maybe I can take a picture of me just like this one some day soon.}

    UPDATE:  My official weigh in showed a loss of  exactly 1 pound and 0.4% body fat.  Also it turns out my hip measurement is down 2.75 inches from my last official taping on January 8th.  That measurement goes around my hips across the "mommy pooch" and the widest part of my butt so it's nice to see that one being down.  All my other measurements either went up marginally or stayed the same.  I am going to watch my food intake more this week and see if I can surpass this week.  So far this year (three weigh ins) I have been in the green.  My goal is to keep it that way (baring any unseen emergencies of course, like my surgeries last year).  Thanks for the encouragement everyone.  It's hard to keep up a new workout schedule when you don't see results right off the bat... even when I know full well that is likely to happen.

    Wednesday, January 12, 2011

    Hello Metabolism

    On Monday I went to the gym and walked for 1 mile.  It took me exactly 20 minutes.  My ankle popped with every step, my fingers and hands swelled, and my right calf was killing me, but I completed the mile as quickly as was comfortable.  I felt alright... not energized, not tired or sore, just alright.  The next day was the same.  The scale didn't really have a difference to it.  I lost less than a pound which means nothing since you can be up to 5 pounds off depending on when you weigh yourself throughout the day.  I just figured it would ROCK to see I was down 3lbs with only one walk.  I still wasn't sore, still not energized, and I didn't really sleep any better that night... but something strange happened about 2 hours after my bowl of cereal breakfast.

    I was driving past the house deciding whether I wanted to stop by and use the restroom or continue on to DH's work and wait a while before he came out for lunch.  I was just about to come to the light for our street and my stomach yelled "PAIN!!!"  I turned toward our house quick, fast and in a hurry.  For the first time since I can honestly remember (while not pregnant) I had hunger pains!  I looked right down at that belly knotting up and said out loud, "Hello Metabolism.... where the hell have you been?!"  It was a very strange feeling indeed.  It happened again close to dinner and again this morning.  See, normally I am NEVER hungry.  I could go an entire day with one meal.  DH had to remind me to eat something.  That is probably why I didn't lose weight well by the way...  Well, my metabolism is back up and I am hungry hungry hungry... time to start eating lean meats, fruits, and veggies!

    Sunday, January 9, 2011

    Motivation Monday, January 10

    Motivation Monday




    Welcome to Motivation Monday! I will be chronicling my journey back to a healthy body, mind, and spirit. Each week I will discuss how the previous week was and set some goals for the next week. I will also be listing my progress. If you would like to see past progress you can click on the Motivation Monday photo above for other Motivation Monday posts.

    If you would like to get motivated with me please link up your post using the link form below. Your post can be in any format you want.Whether you are trying to get healthier physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually or if you just have a task you need some motivation to complete...please link up so we can help support each other. I would love to hear about your progress and help keep you motivated!

    My Non-Scale Goals for 2011

    Here are my Non-Scale Goals (NSG) for 2011. They are essentially any goal I have for my body that has nothing to do with weight, body fat or body mass index.
    • Use a regular sized blood pressure cuff at the doctor's office (they use one sometimes, but not all the time) {Check}
    • Fit in to a junior's size 12 jeans (I was a size 6-8 in HS)
    • Fit in to my original wedding dress (I had to buy a larger one for my wedding and never got to wear my original one; it's about size 12)
    • Be able to ride cowgirl until DH is finished (I had to throw that one in there... this is why family does not know I blog lol)
    • Be able to turn men's heads again like I used to in college
    • Think I look sexy in a piece of lingerie (and not only when I am standing "just so")
    • Look good wearing this Rainbow Brite costume for Halloween
    • Be able to do an exercise video or the Wii for 30 minutes straight
    • Weigh less than DH!  (He is about 185-190)
    • Not feel tired all day long
    • Ride my bike to the gym when the weather permits (about 2 miles)
    • Paint my own toenails without feeling like I can't breathe (my fat squishes my diaphragm)
    More to come soon.  I'll add a link on my sidebar so you can check back and see what new goals I have set for myself! I'll also try to remember to insert that link into a Monday Motivation post when I update it so you can go check it out.  What are some of your NSGs for this year?

    Saturday, January 8, 2011

    And a Naughty Way of Getting There

    So, you wanna know the naughty plan I was talking about in this post to get healthy again so we can have another baby?  Here it is:


    My Weekly Workout Schedule:
    Sunday - Rest and Relax
    Monday - Short 1 Mile Walk
    Tuesday - Lower Body Weight Training
    Wednesday - Short 1 Mile Walk
    Thursday - Upper Body Weight Training
    Friday - Long 3 Mile Walk
    Saturday - Swimming for at least 30 Minutes

    You might be asking, "Um, Jeannette, what is so naughty about that?  Seems pretty straight forward to me..."  Well, it's naughty because I'll be doing all these workouts at the gym (still not naughty?), after 5 pm (not getting it yet?), on post... (making more sense?) while watching sexy soldiers sweating during their workouts!  Naughty huh?  Oh yeah *drool*.   It's like my own little bit of porn while working out.  Sorta like the book Porn for Women that shows topless men vacuuming the living room.

    (Oh yeah, a gym full of these... yes, that's DH)

    I think it's pretty good incentive to work out harder, slim down, and wiggle those hips a bit.  DH thinks I'm silly, but he says it's actually a good idea given how it would motivate me to stand straight and keep good posture while working out.  We'll be swimming together on Saturdays so we can work with LB in the water and I can watch my sexy hubby do the butterfly stroke!  All the other nights I will be going to the gym after dinner so DH can watch LB for me.

     (Not the best photo, but you get the point lol)

    An Excellent Reason for Health


    If I ever had an excellent reason to get healthy, it's now.  The pain from our recent loss has effected DH in such a way that I can't wait to add to our family again.  The sorrow in his eyes and voice when he talks about it pulls at my heart so hard.  My pain comes from seeing other pregnant women knowing I had that but can't again until I lose this weight and get my body back to a healthy state of being.  I want to get pregnant again and put an end to this sadness, but I just can't... and DH agrees.

    It is likely that I will suffer from high blood pressure and gestational diabetes with each of my pregnancies since those two complications tend to be hormone related, however, there is a small chance it could be weight related.  If there is anything I can do to lessen my chances, I want to do it.

    So, in order to put that sparkle back in to my husband's eyes, have that feeling of life and fullness again, and to add to our family I need to get to it and start shedding this excess weight!  My first weigh in of the year was a loss; I want to keep it that way all year long!

    And I have a naughty way of reaching that goal...

    Friday, January 7, 2011

    Friday Fun!

    It's time for Friday Fun!  That means it's time for Friday Party Hop! I hope you'll join me this week for some blog, twitter, and facebook hopping fun!





    Thursday, January 6, 2011

    Hormonal Surge

    There is a phenomenon that happens every time my body surges with estrogen.  I get hormonal!  Every decent looking man who walks by causes me to swoon and imagine him undressing me right there in the store or on the street (even in -20 weather), kissing me and looking at me with fire in his eyes.  It's just a fantasy that makes me want to run home to my hubby ASAP... but it happens none the less.  I also suddenly need to cook sweets, eat chocolate and scrub every square inch of the house!



    Last night I went to the store and giggled at a few soldiers who happened to look my way.  I was probably standing in front of the item they wanted... but I let myself imagine it was my sexy curves!  I also bought some chocolate brownies and chocolate cake mixes.  As soon as I got home I showed DH the brand new condoms I had bought (since I can't go on BC until my HCG numbers go back down) and told him about the soldiers who may or may not have been cute.  (Seriously... I have the funniest taste in men during these hormonal surges...)  He laughed at me and politely declined my hint.  I pouted then pulled out the chocolate mixes.  I said it wasn't the same, but it's a good enough alternative.  Then I spent the next four hours cleaning the house.  I kinda overdid it because I began cramping and bleeding again... oops.
    Then this morning I realized something else... I was still cramping but it was different.  I have discovered the evil, maniacal, horrendous reason for my weight gain.  Today, five days after I miscarried, I am beginning my first period.  Come to think of it, the same thing happened after LB was born.  One week after I had him by c-section, my period came full force.  It must have to do with the dropping hormones.  Normally it would have been next Thursday so it's only one week off from it's regular schedule.  I just can't get a break!  Arg.... you are all right though.  I just need to keep truckin' along, taking it day by day, and if I fall off the "wagon" I'll just run to catch up and jump back on.

    Stylish Blogging

    Sally, over at In My Opinion, thinks my blog is stylish!  Thank you so much Sally.  In My Opinion is a cute blog where Sally, another stay at home mom, gives reviews and offers freebies.

    Just today, the 10th, Jane at Me N' My Monkeys gifted me this award as well.  I am doubly honored.  Thank you Jane!  Jane is a SAHM in Australia with three kiddos, phew! That's a hard job right there.
    The Obligations for Acceptance:
    1. Thank and link back to the person who gave you this award
    2. Share 7 things about yourself
    3. Award 15 other bloggers
    4. Contact these bloggers and tell them about the award
    Seven Things You Might Not Know About Me:
    1.  I am six years my brother's junior and DH is six years his sister's senior.  Strange huh?  Same age differences, different generations.
    2. When I change out my birth control or have a surge in estrogen I have a sudden need to cook sweets, eat chocolate, and clean!  (I'm going through one of those right now! lol)
    3. I wish I was, but I'm not a big fan of play dates.  I want LB to play with other children, but every time it reminds me how behind he is in social skills because of my PPD.  (He was evaluated today and he'll be receiving help from now on with his smiling, talking, walking, and eating.)
    4. One of my favorite pastimes is playing Dungeons & Dragons with my hubby.  We met over D&D, fell in love when our characters did during D&D, and we love to imagine up all kinds of characters to role play.  Dorky I know, but it makes me happy!
    5. I'm a sucker for romance movies and novels... even better if there is a bit of suggestive sex in it!
    6. My favorite author is Anne Rice, followed closely by Jude Deveraux.
    7. It was pretty hard for me to come up with seven things to share that I hadn't already told you.  It seriously took me almost an hour!
    This is normally where you would see the bloggers I am awarding this to... however, I have already given it to all my regular followers so I am doing something new and a bit unconventional.  This award is for all you lurkers.  If you are following my blog and haven't so "hello" or are so new that I have not been able to pass an award on to you yet, this one is for you!

    Tuesday, January 4, 2011

    So Not Fair...

    Someone forgot to tell my body I am no longer pregnant.  I would be in my second trimester now had I not miscarried... but my body is acting as if I really am.  I gained 3lbs in the last two days!  I haven't changed my diet or exercise at all.  In fact, with all these abdominal cramps and losing so much fluid you'd think I would have lost weight.  It is so frustrating seeing the scale go up even after the pregnancy ended.  It's like a slap in the face to an already painful reminder.  I seem to remember I had the same problem with my first miscarriage.  That was a phantom pregnancy though where I gained weight and even continued to feel fetal movement for another month and a half after it ended.  I wouldn't imagine that would happen with this one since I have had some closure already.  The good news is that the doctor says I look alright inside and that I can go back to normal activity as long as I am comfortable. 

    It is going to take a lot of work for me to actually do it... but I think in the evenings I need to fix dinner, get LB down for his evening nap, and then go to the gym while DH can be home with LB.  I really hate working out in the evenings.  I am tired from a whole day of ineffective exercise chasing LB around and all I want to do is relax and spend time with DH.  I really need to get healthy though, and I think after a week or so of forcing myself to go to the gym in the evenings I'll really see some improvement in my energy level.  Wish me luck!

    Saturday, January 1, 2011

    One Year Later

    December 04, 2009                                  December 04, 2010






    Weight: 270lbs                                                       Weight:227lbs
    Body Fat %:  57.3                                                      Body Fat %:  55.3
    Body Mass Index:  44.9                                          Body Mass Index:  37.8
    Bone Mass:  4.2                                                          Bone Mass:  4.2
    Water %:  32.3                                                           Water %:  33.8
    Muscle Mass:  33.6                                                   Muscle Mass:  33.9

    Measurements: July 10, 2010                       Measurements: December 4, 2010
                      {Taken in Inches at the Widest Point on the Left Side}
    Neck   15                                                                        Neck    14.25
    Bicep   14                                                                       Bicep    14.75
    Bust     40                                                                       Bust       37.5
    Waist   46                                                                      Waist    45
    Hip       50                                                                      Hip         49.75
    Thigh   25.5                                                                 Thigh     28
    Calf       17                                                                     Calf        16

    Motivation In Motion - Little Bit's 1st Birthday Party!

    It's been a bit of a wait... but here are the photos from Little Bit's Birthday Party.

     I ran out of time to have a cake made or even to make one but this one was cute enough.

    Welcome 2011 - New Year's Goals

    Not that 2010 was a bad year, but given this week's events I think I am ready to welcome in 2011.  So, without further ado...

    Here are my goals for 2011:
    • Get down to 180lbs, less than 33% body fat, and/or 30% BMI
    • Fit into my original wedding dress - appox. size 8-10 (I had to buy a bigger dress for my wedding and never got to wear my original one)
    • Walk for 30 minutes a day (weather permitting of course)
    • Be able to use a regular sized blood pressure cuff at the doctor's office

    Friday Fun is Back!

    Sorry for being gone so long (and this post being late).  My trip to Texas went as well as could be expected and I am slowly getting back into my routine.  We've been hit with a tragedy this week, but I think getting back to some sort of "normal" is best.

    It's time for Friday Fun!  That means it's time for Friday Party Hop! I hope you'll join me this week for some blog, twitter, and facebook hopping fun!






    A Look Inside Who I Am

    Thank you all for your kind words.  From reading through them and listening to the responses of the doctors and nurses at the emergency room I see how calm and understanding I am.  The thing is, I'm not calm or understanding at all inside.  I wrote a post about it on my depression blog in case you are interested in my inner mental workings.

    Thanks again, and 2011 Goals coming later today.